4 Rules of Tidying with Kids for More Peace and Less Stress at Home
It’s a toss-up on whether or not it’s easier to get your children to eat their vegetables or tidying with kids.
I wish it weren’t so, but this is the reality that many frustrated parents of young children face.
While it’s a challenge to address in most families, it certainly is not impossible.
In this post I share my tips and tricks on how to lessen the mess and stress when it comes to tidying with kids.
Tidying with Kids - Rule #1: Make it fun
Play is serious business for a kid.
It’s actually how they learn so incorporating it into daily life has more benefits than you might think.
When you present a chore to a child, it’s often times difficult to get the child to take the action.
But when you make the chore an engaging game, it magically changes to become play. That’s the idea that we want to mimic for tidying.
Tidying is often thought of to be a chore, however, it doesn’t have to be and it all depends on perspective.
Change the perspective in your household on what it means to tidy up. Allow space for your children to play as they tidy.
While this approach is not swift, it might yield lasting results that you’re after. Tidying is after all a learned life skill that once learned in childhood can be carried into adulthood.
Alternatively, making tidying a chore can cause angst in your child, where they might dread doing it and push back whenever it is time to tidy up.
Here are some ideas for making tidying a game with your children:
Make it a race to see how fast your child can tidy
Sing while tidying up
Count the number of a certain type of toy with your child to practice numbers
Play music while your child picks up their toys and they have to freeze when the music stops. The goal is to not have a toy in your hand when it’s time to freeze.
Consider adding tidying to a daily chart so that your children can track their daily habits and get rewarded after consecutively tidying up during a week or a month.
Tidying with Kids - Rule #2: Respect Your Physical Boundaries
Whether your child has their own room or shares a room, make sure to designate a spot in your home for their toys.
Now, let me clarify by saying, their toys do not belong in the kitchen, the laundry room, the living room, the bed room and all other spots in your home (unless one spot is designated for toys).
Your home is not one giant play room for your children.
We must respect the physical boundaries of our home by giving the kids’ toys a singular place to reside.
Yes, this is a challenge, however it is essential so that you live in a home and not a play room.
Allowing our children to place their toys in every single room can make it confusing to them when you start to tidy up.
That is why, from the start, designate one home for their toys.
Pro Tip: Store kids books upright and contain them with a deep box top or container.
Tidying with Kids - Rule #3: Be Mindful of What Enters
When the clutter piles up, it’s easy to throw up your hands and wonder in exasperation how this happened.
Someone, let items into your home.
It is the simple and honest truth.
Gulp.
I know, it’s a hard pill to swallow.
Whether it’s items from the grandparents, or items from party favors, or knick knacks collected from school, all these items made their way through your front door.
The “how” is what we as parents need to own up to.
It is important to take ownership of the how so that we are mindful about what we allow into our homes.
One of my favorite clutter quotes is from Bruce Lee.
He said, “instead of buying your children all the things you never had, you should teach them all the things you were never taught. Material wears out but knowledge stays.”
Pro Tip: File or pocket folding kids clothes allows your child to see everything they have at a quick glance. Watch the folding videos for extra inspiration.
Tidying with Kids - Rule #4: More is Caught Than Taught
Before parents go on a rampage going on and on about how the home in a mess due to the kids’ toys, let’s take a step back and honestly answer about our own tidying behaviors.
Are you modeling tidying habits that you expect to see in your children?
If the answer is yes, then you’re one of the few and you get a gold star!
For the rest of us, if the answer is no, we need to take a step back and straighten up our own behaviors when it comes to putting items back where they belong and tidying up our items.
More is caught than taught in my household.
I have evidence of this when my sassy eight-year old says something that came straight out of my mouth!
Believe me, it’s humbling when you see bad behavior acting out right before your eyes.
Let’s be a model for our children by walking the walk and talking the talk. It really is that important.
To summarize, the mess not only contributes to stress in your life, but it also trickles into the life of your child. I admit that none of this is easy.
As parents we glamorized the importance of teaching our kids how to read or ride their bike, however, teaching them a life skill about tidying up is just as important as the former skills.
Focus on progress over perfection, addressing it day by day and you’ll soon find your child asking themselves, does this spark joy! (At least my children do. Ha!)
Tidy on and tidy strong, friends.
Southern California based Professional Organizer, Sandy Park, owner and founder of Tidy with SPARK shares her joy of organization with her clients.
She serves clients in Orange County as well as the hundreds of thousands of followers on her combined social media platforms. Connect with Sandy through her website or by connecting through her social channels.
Wow – really insightful tips! – makes me think about what i’ve let into my home! Love the quote from Bruce Lee too!